Friday
Good morning! Thank you for the ideas! I was finally able to start the boy's background! Here is what I have written so far...I know it's not a lot, but, well, READ IT!! :)
They sat like that for what seemed like hours waiting for the rumbling of footsteps that
didn’t come back. When the boy finally loosened his grip on her face, Tasha turned and
dragged the boy outside. “Well,” she said. “I hope you have a good explanation for that.
I haven’t seen a boy in a while, but I know it’s not very good manners to all but gag a
person in a cave she discovered! ” “I’m sorry,” he replied sheepishly. After hearing those
words, Tasha immediately relaxed. She was afraid he would run away again. “It’s kind of
a long story,” he explained. He had a pleasant, calming voice with a light London accent.
Tasha settled down on a rock by the stream. “I’ve got time,” she said. She glanced at him.
“If you don’t finish today, you can tell me tomorrow.” He tensed a little at that, looking
over his shoulders once but he eventually sat down in front of her on the grass. He picked
up a dandelion and watched the seeds scatter in the wind. “I was found on the doorstep of
an orphanage with a note tucked in the blankets,” The boy began. He watched Tasha with
a smile playing on his face as she visibly lost quite a bit of interest. “The note said two
things,” He continued, still smirking a bit. “One, that my name was Tom, and two, that
I was to be killed.”
Intense, right?!? This is SO good so far! (Well I think it is...hopefully you think so too.)
My school situation hasn't gotten much better. I still have been eating lunch with my sister for the past few days, (who actually is a little unhappy with me right now but let's not talk about that,) and I still haven't made many friends. And by that I mean any. I'm not really friendly, okay? I don't go up to strangers and go, "HEY. Wanna be FRIENDS???????" (To which I would hope the stranger would reply with: "Get away you creepy weirdo, why are you talking like that?") ANYWAY.
I've recently started rereading the Percy Jackson series, (RICK RIORDAN IS AMAZING!!) so that the story is fresh in my mind for when the new one, The Tower of Nero comes out on October 6th. YAY.
For a gifted assignment our teacher had us write 1-2 pages about a fictional food item you have always wanted to try. I thought I would post mine, and ask what foods you all would want to try. (I say "you all" ironically, as there are probably only about two people who actually read this consistently, but whatever.)
I know I'm only supposed to pick one, but I feel like it’s kind of a given that if I want to try
nectar, I also have to try ambrosia. (Also from the Percy Jackson series, obviously.) To
Percy it had the texture of pudding, and tasted like popcorn. Does it always taste like
popcorn? Wouldn’t eating popcorn in pudding form be super gross? I NEED TO KNOW!!!
ANyway. That's all for today I think. I'll try to post more consistently, and to add to my story! (And give it a name,
but that's not important.) BYE.
P.S. Should I actually give my posts titles? Or does just doing the day of the week work?
Comments PLEASE!! :)
I think it's fine if you just do the date
ReplyDeleteI'm on my way out of town right now and will read this later.
ReplyDeleteBut...if you are near Carlisle, the Bosler Library on the corner of West and High streets
has The Bookery bookstore inside it. It's run by the Friends of the Library and the proceeds all go to supporting library and literacy programs. Everything is donated and over 95% of the books and other things go for $2 or less, kids through YA, mostly fifty cents to a dollar.
Tue/Thur 10-6. Fri/Sat 10-4
I found what looks like a really user friendly book on screenwriting. If your family are near Carlisle, stop in. You can go to the desk inside The Bookery and tell them that Melissa Sheperd has some books set back on the hold shelf and one is for you.
The Bookery usually has great books on writing and a ton of Teen/YA, although we never know what will come in.
I may be near Harrisburg, Wormleysburg, Tuesday afternoon and could meet up with your mom after my appointment if you are interested. It is $2.
Enjoy your weekend.
First, Percy Jackson is a fun and useful introduction to the ancient Greek mythos (stories that explain something) as long as you don't take the way Riordian paints the mythos as completely accurate.
ReplyDeleteNectar is indeed a drink. Ambrosia is the food -- Honey given by Melissa (the first honeybee) to Zeus and Hera at their wedding. Ambrosia is honey directly mixed with the nectar of flowers, hence the name. Any human who drinks Nectar from the specific jar named by Zeus, will become immortal. Cool, huh?
Go do something with that --- PJ fan fiction, maybe....?
Second, go ahead and disagree with your sister. It's normal sibling reality. Just keep it all above board because know you two will be together for a long time.
Third - Titling? However you prefer for the day. Your blog. Your choice.
Fourth - Tasha and the boy.
Good, clear writing, scene order, economy of words/text, tension and release, and so on.
You know and work your strengths.
Paragraph set ups.
What do you notice the difference in voice between your story continuation with the boy and Tasha and your PJ/Nectar piece?
Take a minute.
Consider the "narrative" vs the "stream of consciousness."
The Nectar piece is a short, concise stream of consciousness that is perfectly suited to a single paragraph.
However, when working within a "narrative" format that has differing points of view (POV) and dialogue, dividing the writing into paragraphs leads the reader through a path of complexities like thought, dialogue, motion, description, etcetera.
I'm talking about clarity - for the reader and the writer.
Paragraphs aid the writer by positioning the text for editing - down, up and across.
Without paragraph breaks, the reader tires quickly following between dialogue and exposition and the characters pitching and catching each.
When you submit to the Scholastic contest this fall, paragraph separation will help the judges see the high quality of your writing.
One last thing -- look at the first sentence, "They sat like that for...." and think commas.
Commas can be tricky but you are close to mastering them.
It's a sentence with two different degrees of tension. Read it out loud and hear where the dividing point between the two areas is and place a comma between. Then, read it again.
Look at the sentence "Then read it again."
Within that simple four word sentence are three different comma possibilities.
Each one says something a little different.
Then read it again. Straightforward, general instruction.
Then, read it again. Suggests a gently pushing instruction for a purpose.
Then read it, again. More strongly pushed instruction with a little aggravation.
Each one is right for its purpose yet each is unique to a situation.
Keep writing and reading and hug your family.